Onus Obinyan
 But, na wa o! Which kain hotel be dis Sunnyside Hotel and Suites beside former Channel 10 guest house, Ketu sef? A Customer lodges…one hour to expiration of stay, the ladies at the Reception dey use intercom disturb person life. Una dey pursue customer ni? Wetin sef? That disposition towards the Lodger stinks to high heavens. Secondly, I stayed in room 2002 that is labelled STANDARD…and the door is so bad, it can be kicked in by a Toddler. Third is my shocking experience with the bathroom sink…you know, that apparatus that you spit the foam and water swishing in your mouth into. Well I did just that and got everything from my mouth directly on my feet…how come?! The sink leaked badly. Plumbing? F9! Na wa o! Need I say more?Mtscheeeew!!!
Ehen…e get one better bread like that, wey I love gan, hot and soft (no be sliced bread o).I have bought it twice from Deebie’s Bakery on Ikosi road. If you involve that bread with Egun people beans ehn, e go be like make the food nor finish. Now, my problem is with that fine boy that sells the bread. You are supposed to be sharp and alert when you deal with Customers. Yet your ears are sound proofed with booming music from the tiny wires of the earpiece attached to your phone, virtually locking your buyers out that they need to shout to get your attention, even when they are standing so close to you.It means you don’t give a hoot about your Customers. It’s bad for business bruv. You  dey dull.
The other day, I dey for insideEco bank compound,  Ketu. It was a few minutes past four pm. I wan use my ATM card remove small thing from my already lean account, when I happened on the mad rush to get into the banking hall.As the doors opened to swallow up customers, one middle aged lady wasn’t allowed to go in…WHY? But I picked the words,so because I nor settle, I nor fit enter Bank abi? She shout tire, ranting, and gesticulating. For where? The Security officials just balance dey look her. No level. Faced with their silence, she walked away, hurling curses at their future generations. Too bad! Smh!
I still don’t understand why Addide Cashiers find it difficult to give you change when you buy things. The anthem complaint when they see you with a thousand Naira note is Haaa! No change o! As big as Addide is? Well, I and my homeboy bought two bottles of soft drinks, and I cracked mine open, drinking on the spot after the Cashier guy told us there was no change. Looking at me like who be dis kraze sef? Me I dey look am like you fit chop person? He gave us our N760 change sharply. Rubbish!

Ikorodu garage…Monday morning, the 7th day of November 2016 was hellish. Whaaaaaat?! No Red Bus? See the mammoth crowd of Commuters waiting endlessly for buses. But na wa o! Black man to black man, we wicked o! We too dey over-capitalize. With strong face Conductor dey halla Mile 12, Ketu, Oshodi, N400 sitting, N200 standing. No choice…I squeezed in my tiny frame next to a lusciously curvy and bootilicious chicin green and black on my right (e be like say she go school well well, her English plenty). I trip when I look my left, see one slim old woman, with one first class fat Iya on her laps. Plenty shout, complain and quarrel inside bus, as body dey jam body, sweat dey rub sweat, Conductor dey use agbara collect money, but e nor concern me. My business now is this well rounded, plump cutie beside me. After plenty shakara, she gave me her number sha. The Lord is good. Haaaa! Bus-stop o! Ile-Ile wa o!
Question for Television Continental. What’s up with the consist entrepetition of your music videos playlist in your void fillers? The last few days has me watching the music videos of Kymo, Zion, Fefe, Buckwyla and others…all of these in same order. Una wan blind us with visual boredom? Yeah, these acts need the air play and promo but pushing it in our faces isn’t right.

These telecoms providers are seriously pissing on my parade and I don’t like it one bit. With Airtel,*126*2*pin hash increases your airtime recharge six times. I did this on the night of the 14th, this month and the next thing I knew, my credit was down to N30, all the way from N1, 200, in less than an hour or thereabout. I dialed 111 at 9:26pm and got Joshua, a Customer care representative with a bad, barely perceptible voice (I wonder how he got the job), who told me that my airtime ran out because I browsed the internet with it. But, how is this possible when I still had data from my Sunday morning data subscription? Why charge me for internet use from regular airtime recharge? Besides, Tuesday morning came and my data was through. No more browsing. Haaaa! Airtel, Airtel, Airtel Na wa o!You people are wicked o! Also, after a 10/11 years relationship, MTN, consciencelessly still manages to hyper my network sorrows seriously, data wise and all…even worse than my less than a year relationship with Airtel does. NCC…where una dey o? Heeeeeeeelp! These networks are stifling me. Dem just dey  give us fine, fine adverts for television with human angle themes…all na lie. They are cold hearted Capitalists.